How to Make Peanut Butter Pot Blondies

by Mr. Strain

Peanut butter pot blondies

Peanut butter pot blondies—a delicious pot brownie alternative!

I ran into a problem recently: I had a sore ass throat and had to stop smoking. At first it seemed like a curse: movies got worse, video games were boring, I was only average at guitar and I started listening to my girlfriend. Er, friend that is a girl. Anyway, I needed to get stoned to help with my condition and I needed to get there fast.

I’ve made nasty ass brownies both from scratch and from a box. The problem with brownies is that the chocolate is not strong enough to cover the herbal taste. So, while I was standing in the hall talking to myself about what to eat with weed, a very kind and busty neighbor of mine happened around the corner and said she had overheard me explain my dilemma to my friend earlier. Her professional attire took me off guard as much as her suggestion: peanut butter blondie.

Peanut butter fucking blondie?! It sounded killer without weed, so I was confident that it would be the shit with weed. My neighbor asked me if I had a mixer. I said no, but I have a penis. She said that my penis was insufficient for stirring batter, so I could come over and use her mixer. Of course, I would have to give her a few of my treats (women are never NSA, ya know). What could I say? No? Busty professional looking chick that wants to bake and get baked? Done.

The Recipe

  1. Preheat oven to 170º
  2. Before one can cook with weed, it has to be cured. Run the bud through a grinder, pick out all the big, nasty stems and seeds.
  3. Measure out 1/2 gram portions and put each portion in a slot of a mini muffin pan. powdered and ground weed
  4. Stick the mini muffin pan (with portioned weed) in the oven at 170º for 2 hours. YOU MUST COMPLETE THIS STEP.
  5. When the 2 hours is up, take out the pan. DON’T FORGET TO TAKE OUT THE PAN.
  6. Carefully, doing only one portion at a time, run the cured weed through the mortar and pestle. weed and pestle
  7. Preheat oven to 350º
  8. In a medium bowl mix 3/4 cup peanut butter and 1/3 softened butter. peanut butter and butter being mixed Stop when the mix looks like this: mixed butter and peanut butter
  9. Mix in 2/3 cup white sugar and 1/2 cup brown sugar. add sugar and brown sugar
  10. Mix in 2 eggs and 1/2 teaspoon vanilla extract. Note the consistency of the batter from the previous step. add eggs to the batter
  11. In a separate bowl combine 1 cup flower, 1 teaspoon baking powder and 1/4 teaspoon salt. Add to the peanut butter mixture until well blended. Be sure to add flour in two parts. add flour to the mixture
  12. Mix 1/8 cup of batter with each portion of weed in the mini muffin pan.
  13. Bake for 15-20 minutes, or until the top springs back when touched.
  14. Allow them to cool before removing. weed and peanut butter blondies

My busty neighbor and I each ate a blondie and well…it took me 3 days to get around to writing this post ;)

As a note, because the weed is crushed into such fine particulate from the mortar and pestle it absorbs really fast, especially on an empty stomach (hint, hint). As for now, I still have some left and I just realized that I am. stoned. as. fuck. So, I’ll be seein’ ya.

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